Coping with RSD: What is Hyper-Independence?

Hyper-Independence is rarer than the other coping mechanisms, because it is a more severe response. There are many reasons that some people lean more independent. Sometimes it is by necessity due to life circumstances. Some people with RSD might experience social isolation as a result of repeated rejection spirals going unresolved which over time alienates the people close to them. 

When someone with RSD has experienced self-isolation in the past, they may cope by becoming extremely self-sufficient in their own life and will often avoid or refuse taking help from others as a preventative measure in case they end up isolated again in the future. Except now, without strong bonds with other people, you have no trust of people in general. You feel constantly in danger of everything falling apart, because close relationships are what give us a sense of safety and security. 

So, when you do eventually look to other people for connection, you don’t actually open yourself up to the possibilities. You hold them to a high standard. People can’t just be people. They have to be a solution to your problems. So, you put way too much pressure on them to fill the hole in your life while exposing them to your harsh prejudice towards others which naturally pushes them away. You take every rejection as more proof that other people just complicate your life and make you miserable.